Evilsciencechick’s

OK, well this was supposed to be a quick trip into the lab to start cultures, but then I realized I was out of tryptophan and dammit, that shit takes forever to dissolve. So while I’ve got THAT going on….

THE ANSWERS TO EVERYTHING (except the meaning of life)

or

HOW MANY TIMES CAN I MENTION “PUDDING” IN A SINGLE POST?

Jamie asks:

WHY do I suddenly not care about my blog? It was all going so well. I feel no pressure. I simply don’t care if I never post again… Why?

Ah…blogging malaise. It happens to the best of us. You’ve got a lot of crap going on right now and it’s too much to deal with yourself, let ALONE trying to figure out how to put it in words for blogland’s greedy eyes. I suggest a blog sabbatical. Take a break. Relax. Deal with real life for a while. Instead of blogging, read a book, crochet or knit, or hell, watch TV. Smack your kids around some.

KIDDING!

I think we get burned out because we start to consider blogging an obligation. Like we have to put something interesting up so the people who read us will be satisified. NUH UH! I think we all had our personal reasons to start blogging, and probaby not too many of us started one to entertain OTHER people.

Just take a few weeks off, and then come back refreshed and ready to blog again

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Seth asks:

What is your favorite “liquid” dessert? i.e. jello, pudding, tapioca, mousse, etc…
What food item is always in your house?
What are a few things you would do if the lottery was won by you?

Whoa, 3 at once! Ummm…OK. Liquid dessert? Well, if I’m making it myself…PUDDING! mmmm…pudding. Any flavor. Chocolate and vanilla being the favorites. But I do have to say I love a gooood mousse. As long as someone else is making it!

Geez, with the amount of time I spend at the grocery store, what food item ISN’T always at my house?? I would have to say….pasta. And sauce. When I am too tired to be creative in the kitchen, I ALWAYS make sure I have pasta and a sauce-base of some kind around. With very little effort, I can make a VERY delicious dinner. Ummm…also we always have jello pudding mix around. YUM!

And the lottery? I’m assuming we’re talking the mega-millions here. Well, I’ve come too far in grad school to quit now, so I would probaby still get my pHD. I would upgrade our housing and vehicles, of course. Then afterwards…well…I’d probably get us a nice house in the woods some where, lots of land, near a lake, of course. And then…I don’t know. Persue the things I’ve always wanted. Not be lazy, though. Maybe if we were near a town, open up a small cafe style restaurant. Just serve breakfast and lunch, so I can be home in the evenings. Build Kev a big huge workshop and let him tinker with tools, wood, and cars all he wants. Basicially just enjoy life without financial worry.

And, of course, but lots and lots of really nice yarn.

BWAHA!

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Jennifer asks:

What is the scariest thing you and Kev have been through together?

Yikes! Well…let’s see. Nothing too over the top scary, thank God. Not long after we first started dating, my condo association went insane and sued me over my viscious dog. I don’t know who complained about her (I have an idea, though) or what they said or WHY they said it, but poor Sadie had to go live with Kev for a while (this was before we moved in together, of course) while I tried to work things out with the association. It was scary because I thought I might have to get rid of Sadie for good, AND try to come up with the HUGE INSANE amount of money the association was demanding. In the end I did have to pay a good chunk of it (I had to borrow it from my parents…I was so ashamed and horrified), but I did get Sadie back. The whole experience was scary because I no longer felt secure and welcomed in my own home. I am still nervous in my condo. Sadie doesn’t get as much outside time as she used to, because I’m afraid she’s going to bark at a cat in the wrong window and have to go through the process all over again. I also felt like I was living in insane world, because I kept hearing from the association that they don’t allow viscious dogs, and I kept saying SHE’S NOT VISCIOUS! HOW COULD YOU THINK SHE WAS VISCIOUS????

Anyway, that was more scary for me, not so much for Kev, who stood by me and took good care of my baby for those long months. But we got through it together, and that’s what’s important.

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BettyAgnes asks:

What are your top 3 - 5 favorite movies?When and how did you have your first peanut-allergic reaction? I mean, I guess the “how” is obvious; but did you have any idea what it was at the time? Do you have to use your Epi Pens very often?

OK, do you want a range of 3 to 5? I’m confused.

in no particular order;

1. The Princess Bride

2. Much Ado About Nothing

3. Clueless (shut UP, it’s FUNNY!)

We first discovered my nut allergy when I was about 2 years old. Up until that point, I had been happily eating PBJ sandwiches. But one time, my mother took me shopping to the big Kaufmann’s where they had a restaurant inside. She got me the standard PBJ….and I got sick and threw up. My parents figured out rather quickly that all nuts were off limits. It wasn’t a big surprise, as my father is allergic, too. But for most of my life, the worst reaction I would have was getting sick to my stomache. In fact, as I got older, it seemed that my reaction was getting milder. Until…a few years ago my advisor brought some chocolates back from France. The coffee flavored chocolate I popped in my mouth obviously containe more than just coffee flavored chocolate. I took some Benadryl and tried to wait it out…no good. After a while, I made myself throw up…but it was too late. My throat was swelling. That had never happened before. I ended up in the emergency room.

I was given a prescription for one epi pen to carry around, but in the back of my mind, I was hoping that it was a fluke, that the stupid french had engineered some “super” nut that had fucked me up. STUPID FRENCH FUCKERS!

A few months later I was at a party that was catered by an indian restaurant, and all the Indian people there assured me that everything was fine for me to eat. Nope. I started to get the funny feeling in the back of my throat. I popped some Benedryl and decided to wait it out. I stayed for another hour. My asthma started to kick up. I blamed it on the cat and puffed my inhaler. My hands got itchy. I said my goodbyes and drove home. I made myself throw up, but by that time, my face was swollen up big time. I was getting a rash on my palms and on my belly. It was a very different reaction from the last time. Eventually, I decided that treating myself was not helping. I gave myself the epi pen shot in the leg, and drove myself to the ER. The doctor was a little freaked out when I said I had given myself the shot. While it made my breathing easier, I was still pretty swollen. When I was released the following day, I had a prescription for TWO epi pens.

That was about…3 years ago. And I haven’t used my epi pens since. Not that I haven’t accidentally eaten a nut, but now I know the drill. THE SECOND I realize that I’ve eaten a nut, I IMMEDIATELY throw up, take a massive dose of benedryl, and then lay down. I’ve done this twice, and it worked. No epi pen or hospital neccessary.

KNOCK ON WOOD!

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Serra asks:

Have you and Kev ever staged “Fun With Porno Flick” Night? If so, how’d it go?

Do you mean filming our own porno? No. We don’t have a video camera. Yet. We’ve had fun with my digital camera before, and NO, NONE OF YOU WILL BE SEEING THOSE PICTURES!

If you mean do Kev and I enjoy watching porn together? Well, then. Yes. Yes we do. It’s always fun

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Sideshow Bob asks:

Are you really evil? If so, are you the “mean and nasty” kind or the “absense of good” kind?

And does your dog watch you guys do it?

I’m more evil in a mischievous kind of way. A little nasty. I don’t think I lack ALL good. I might be slightly good deficient, but I take vitamin supplements.

Sadie isn’t allowed in the bedroom, but not for that reason. She used to sleep next to the bed at night, but Kev came pretty close to stepping on her in the middle of the night too many times, so she sleeps in the sunroom in her big crate.

That being said…the bedroom is not the only place we “do it.” If Sadie happens to be in the same area when then festivities begin, she’ll usually give us a look like “oh not AGAIN” and wander off to her crate with a “humph.” However, if things get LOUD (ok, if I get loud) she’ll often come over to investigate because she thinks it’s play time. If she gets TOO “nosey” (nothing like a cold dog nose on your butt to ruin the mood), she’ll be banished to the crate again.

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JP asks:

So, when you guys are doing it, where is the dog? Does he watch, yawn, run the other way? Where the hell is he? I can’t perform if a dog is watching me. I feel like I’m being critiqued.

Everyone is concerned about Sadie! Kev gets creeped out if she just stares at him. But she does that ALL the time, not just during nookie. (a simple AAAAAAAGH! STOP IT! usually gets her to look away). But I don’t think either one of us is too concerned if Sadie catches a good show now and again

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Julie asks:

What items of food have you and Kev used in the bedroom. And don’t tell me none, because you both like food and sex, it is a logical combination.

Actually, we don’t use food in the bedroom that often. I think it’s a messiness factor. Both of us are a little too anal (HA!) to purposely make a mess that, after the fesitvities end, will be a pain to clean up.

Not that we haven’t done ANYTHING with food. Never underestimate the fun that can be had with a can of whipped cream and some gently warmed ice cream toppings. But as far as rolling around on a rubber sheet and a gallon of chocolate pudding….no.

But actually…now that’s sounding pretty good….

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Dammit…Janet (heehee…can’t resist) asks:

Did you read the article about the cheerleaders having sex in the public restroom. What do you think they were doing exactly, and have you ever done the same thing with Kev or anyone else in a public restroom?

I did hear about the incident…HA! Nekkid cheerleaders DOIN’ IT! If I didn’t know any better, I’d say it was a ruse set up by the Bush administration to divert our attention away from more important issues. NEKKID CHEERLEADER CONSPIRACY!

And….no. I’ve never done anything like that.

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Se7en asks:

Salami or bologna? And why?

Salami. HARD Salami (hey, stop giggling over there!). Because it’s spicy and greasy and mmmmm….so good! (I MEAN IT! Stop laughing!)

I like it on a sandwich with crispy icebert lettuce and yellow mustard.

Bologna is just too bland.

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so that’s it! Some really good questions this time. Hope I answered them all to everyone’s satisfaction. and if not…TOUGH TOENAILS! Have a great weekend!

oh, and PUDDING!

Yay! Lots of questions! Of course, I gave you until tuesday, so you can STILL ask away. But I couldn’t resist answering the ones we’ve gotten so far.

So without further ado, I present the VERY FIRST “ask the evils!”

Serra asks:
What do I say to a man who’s convinced that if he’s caught having sex outside (yes, with me, do you really think I’d put up with him having sex with anyone ELSE? Hellz no!) his life won’t be over? And that the chances of being caught are very small but just enough to add some spice?

OK, I asked Kev’s opinion on this. His suggestion: Without revealing your true plans, take him out for something like a casual picnic. Bring a nice big blanket. Make sure you go somewhere pretty isolated. Enjoy yourselves – have some wine, some good simple food, get him nice and relaxed. Then very casually but deliberately, make your move. Kev suggested the unzipping of the pants and blowjob. Hopefully any initial objections he has will soon be wiped away, along with any OTHER thoughts in his head. Hopefully, once he realizes that no lightening bolts have struck you down, and no one actually SAW you (OH MY GOD HOW TERRIBLE) his fears will melt away! Good luck!

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Derek asks:
why does latex stink the way it does?

Latex starts out as a liquid. One of the components in liquid latex is ammonia. So yeah, latex stinks at first. But if you’re worried about that latex man-thong of yours stinking forever and turning off the Mrs, don’t Eventually, the ammonia will dissipate, and you can wear your man-thong with complete confidence!

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Yoli asks:
Why are you a sex nazi?

I am a sex nazi because I like you. And since the doctor said you can’t have sex for a certain number of weeks after your procedure thingie…then…NO SEX FOR YOU! I don’t want anything to happen to my fun Yoli-girl!

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David asks:
Why in Hell isn’t my RT-PCR working? My bloody boss wants to use RT-PCR to confirm 2 fold increases instead of Westerns–but I should still be able to occasionally detect something!

Ahhh…PCR. Fun! As all good scientists know, PCR is half voodoo, half blind luck. RT-PCR is mostly voodoo. I tried it a few times…and all I can say is….ACK! PCR in general sucks. What works one day will absolutely refuse to work the next. Do everything right and get nothing, do everything wrong, and amazingly it works! Next time, maybe try spitting in your tubes.

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Liaps asks:
Seriously, you’re gonna have sex on a quad in the woods?? I’m an admitted redneckophile, but damn, I’m jealous!

We actually ran out of time on this trip – it was tough to shake his mom! But yes, we have had sex on the back of an ATV in the middle of the woods, with several dogs watching before. And oh yes, it was hawt.

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Just a Girl asks
Sex on a 4-wheeler. Fantastic.
Ever had sex on a Harley? It wobbles a lot because there’s only 2 wheels.
Have fun girlie!

And, to follow Serra’s question…What do you say to an officer when you ARE busted for…um…having relations in public?

Never had sex on a Harley, but as Kev is bound and determined to own a motorcycle again one day, I probably will. I’ll keep in mind the wobble thing though, thanks!

We have never been busted before, and I really have no idea what I’d do if we were. If it was a complete stranger? Probably nothing. A parent? Act innocent. A cop? Run like hell!

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Cinnamon asks:
Newly returning to “dating”. (Or at least I would be if I could meet someone. ) But to be prepared when I do….

With the general disclaimer that it’s not a one-night act of sluttishness, they haven’t met at an actual sex club durning an orgy, it’s not a booty call, and he is a nice guy, etc. etc, and for arguements sake let’s pretend that I am somwhat of a nice girl, and will wait until the “second” time to pull out the riding crop and handcuffs……. How long should a girl wait to have sex with a new guy she likes and wants? I’ve heard the first date is slutty, but waiting for a designated time period of say 2 months, when you both are feeling attracted, seems unnaturally arbitrary, so what’s a good norm?

I would say that if it feels right, then it’s right. If all the passion and feeling is there right away, then go for it! If you have to worry about him thinking you’re slutty, then maybe he’s not the guy for you. Probably good to feel him out (figuratively!!!) ahead of time. An attempt to jump the bones of a strict Catholic who wants to wait until marriage might be…AWK-WARD!
As for me and Kev…well….have I ever blogged about our second date? It lasted almost 48 hours

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Sloth asks:
Just exactly how much do you adore me?

Muches and muches.

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Julie asks:
So what are you gonna cook for me when I see you in TWO WEEKS?

No, seriously, how do you deal with political differences in a relationship?

I dunno…what do you like to eat?

Your second question is a little more difficult. The simple answer is: we don’t talk politics much. Neither one of us are huge political activists, so it’s not like we’re at each other’s throat 24 hours a day. We do agree on a lot of hot button issues, the really emotional ones that can really get people going. We’re both pro-choice, we both think people should be allowed to own guns (though I would like to have limits, while Kev doesn’t think so), etc, etc. I don’t think our relationship would survive if we disagreed on EVERYTHING. We do disagree on certain things, though, but we have enough respect for each other that it doesn’t really come between us. We have some really good conversations based on these differences. And we respect the other’s opinion, and realize that we’re never going to agree on EVERYTHING.
We do have a rule that all politics must stay OUT of the bedroom. And that’s including watching anything political on TV. Once I was giving Kev a handjob (yes, mutual masturbation is FUN! And good when you’re both horny and totally exhausted) while watching something on TV that was REALLY pissing me off. The angrier I got, the tighter my grip…until I had a stranglehold on…well…yeah. Kev wasn’t very happy. That’s when we made the no politics rule.

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Seth asks:
Is there a preference between circumcised and uncircumcised? And why if there is.

I have been with both cut and uncut, and I can say that I have no real preference. Other people have brought up a “smegma” issue, but as long as the uncut guy keeps himself clean, there’s no difference. And there’s no difference in “feel” either, as far as I can tell. I can only speak for myself, though.

Kev is uncut. He thinks that he might be more sensitive down there because he is more “protected” (ie, not rubbing against his underwear all day). But he doesn’t really have anything to compare it to.

And yes, Kev keeps himself IMMACULATELY clean down there, and won’t let me get CLOSE if he feels that he is less than immaculate. Of course, I generally get the little nudge nudge of “hey, ummm..I just showered…just so you know…hehehe…”

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Shannon asks:
Where do I find a guy who will indulge me in anal sex AND love me?

Ahh, the age old question…anal sex and love…

I have a difficult time believing that there are too many guys unwilling to indulge your fondness for anal sex. In fact, it seems that there are a LOT of guys who just never shut UP about it!
As for where to find love…well…I found love on the internet. I highly recommend it

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Jennifer asks:
You’re not married are you? Is marriage anywhere in the future?

What are you, my mother??? Hehehe…just kidding. No, we’re not married. Not engaged.

*siiiiggggghhhh*

yes, it’s in the future. We’ve talked about it. We’ve looked at rings. Kev has PROMISED me that THIS is the year. But knowing him and his fondness for being difficult, he’ll propose on Dec 31 at 11:59pm. Don’t worry, blogland will probably know before my parents do when he pops the question!

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anon asks:
how was your first time and when

oooo…yay! My first anonymous question! My first time….ugh. Well, I was a VERY late bloomer – 23! I originally felt that my first time should be “special” and with someone “I love.” And then I realized that that was a bunch of crap. I wanted to be able to date and have sex and not have this big “my first time” pressure hanging over my head.

At that time, I was friends/fooling around with a guy named Craig who was 10 years older than me. Craig was one of those people that could suck allll the joy out of a room very quickly. Seriously, he was very depressing. Think Richard Lewis, only more depressed and not funny. But I didn’t have many friends at the time (this was during my first year in Atlanta), and while it took some convincing (he felt that my first time should be “special,” too. Bah! FUCK MEEEE!

Well…we tried a few times. Craig had difficulties maintaining an erection. He was on Paxil Seriously, this was more than a naïve virgin like me should have to deal with. I was VERY frustrated. But eventually, he was able to make a performance.

My overall review? Quick. I hardly felt anything. And I wasn’t entirely sure he had actually done anything.

Still, could have been worse. And did I become a dating sexual machine afterwards? No…no..not really. It was 2 years before I had another chance.

Craig and I parted ways soon after our night of…whatever that was. I got tired of his joy-sucking. I posted all about it…somewhere on here. He was an ass, really.

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Restless angel asks:
How exactly does someone who’s kinda shy get back into the dating game?

I have said it before, and I’ll say it again: INTERNET DATING. There was no one more shy than I was when I decided I needed to get back into dating. You can check out guys (or girls) remotely, and they can check YOU out. There’s no pressure, there’s no worrying about hurting feelings. You can keep it to email or even phone conversations, before you would even consider meeting. I know my confidence got a little boost every time someone sent me a message, or responded to one of mine. And the price is generally right: around $20-25 a month. Cheaper than a night out at noisy smelly bars full of drunk people!

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Vince asks:
Don’t know if anyone’s asked this already, but why mad science? I’m curious as to why you picked the profession you did. I know I picked chemistry because I didn’t know any better. I was good at it, I just later found out I was better at being a computer geek.

I have always naturally leaned towards science. As a kid, I loved reading about dinosaurs, geology, gemology, physiology….whatever I could scrounge around for in my local library or find through exploring the Carnegie Museum.

I was LOUSY AT CHEMISTRY, though. Seriously, it was my worst subject. It was the one and ONLY time I ever got a D on a report card. God…I hate chemistry. *shudder* Of course, I hate physics worse. HA! Anyway, we did a big unit on genetics in AP biology my senior year in high school, and I was hooked. I found it fascinating. I felt that so many questions could be answered through studying those tiny mysterious double helices. And…most importantly, I was GOOD at it! I remember staring at a test I had gotten a “100% Excellent” on, and thinking…”this is it! This is what I want to do!” Corny, huh?

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Sarah the Pengiun asks:
What’s all the hoopla about butt sex?
Obviously I’m doing it wrong because I’d rather watch elephant porn.
Is there some book on how to have butt sex so that it feels good ?
Maybe it’s just one of those personal prefrence things like coke and pepsi.

PS. How big is this 4-wheeler you are going to have sex on?
Is is a 4-wheeler that holds 2?

I think probably the world can be divided into two groups of people: those who enjoy anal sex, and those who don’t. If you do everything right: use plenty of lube, go slowly and remember to relaaaax, you have a partner who is gentle and understanding and who cares about your pleasure, and who you feel completely comfortable with…if you do all of that, and you STILL don’t enjoy it…well…maybe anal sex just isn’t for you. Don’t be upset. There are plenty of other orifices that are perfectly wonderful, and I don’t think anyone every lay on their deathbed wishing they’d enjoyed anal sex more.

The 4-wheeler in question was for one, technically, though we rigged it for both of us. The sex was more with me leaning over the back of it, and Kev behind me. So technically we weren’t ON TOP of the vehicle, but we probably would have fallen off and hurt ourselves, which definitely would NOT have been hawt.

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Celti asks:
Hmmm…the only thing I can think of is this: What was Kev’s reaction the first time you had one of those orgasms that made you cry? Did he freak out?

So for those of you who haven’t read any posts where I have referred to this, very rarely, I will have an orgasm that is SO INTENSE, that afterwards I am so overcome with emotion that I start crying. Big, choking, hysterical, loud sobbing. And yes, the first time it happened, Kev freaked out. It was after a very long session of “manual” stimulation, followed by sex, and he thought somehow he had hurt me. Even I was freaked out, because it was the first time it happened for me, too! In between sobs, I had to try to make it clear that it was a VERY GOOD kind of crying, and not the complete mental breakdown that it appeared to be.

Something like this: “*sob sob sob* no! *sob* I’m OK! *choking sob* *gasp* I’m fine! *sob gasp sob* I love you! *waaaahhhhhhhh!*

It’s still a rare event around here. Every time we think we’ve found the “formula,” it changes. But it’s very special when it happens.

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Seth asks
What is glory hole etiquette?

Dude, I don’t KNOW! I suppose for the guy, just be clean. And for the girl, watch the teeth!