it’s a swallow! from John! something about a fire! oh my!
today at church, during the children’s sermon, the children proved that we’re all born lawyers. More »« Less
Archive for the 'Religion!' Category
director: so for this section, we’re going to do a layered effect: basses come in first, then tenors, then altos, then sopranos
soprano: so…B…T…A…S
director: yes, BTAS
everyone, writing down on their music: B…T…A….S…
ESC can’t stop herself, quietly: BTAS…hehehe…beat your ass…
alto sitting next to ESC: what? heheheheee….what???
ESC: uhh…beat your ass?
entire choir and director: what??? hahahahahaaa!!! beat your ass!
later…
director: so now we’re going to do the first time with just instrumental, the second repeat the basses will come in, then the tenors, etc, etc…
entire choir writing it down
soprano2: how will we remember that…?
ESC: instrumental! just add I! IBTAS - I BEAT YOUR ASS!
entire choir: BWAAAAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!
OK, maybe you had to be there for it to be really funny. we’re a funny group.
What could distract me from my bout of bridezillaness-ness?
ahem.
ATTENTION SUPER-CHRISTIANS!
THE MIDDLE EAST HAS BEEN A HOTBED OF WARS AND RELIGIOUS TURMOIL FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS.
THIS RECENT…ERR…RE-ACTIVATION OF VIOLENCE BETWEEN ISRAEL AND LEBANON DOES NOT MEAN IT’S THE END OF THE WORLD!!!
ALSO, THE BOOK OF REVELATIONS WAS WRITTEN IN THE CONTEXT OF EARLY CHRISTIAN OPRESSION BY THE ROMAN EMPIRE. THE SYMBOLYSM CONTAINED WITHIN THE TEXT IS THOUGHT BY MOST REAL OLD TESTAMENT SCHOLARS TO REFER TO ROME, THE EMPIRE, AND THE EMPEROR AT THAT TIME. IT WAS MEANT TO PROVIDE A MEANS OF HOPE FOR CHRISTIANS UNDER TREMENDOUS PERSECUTION AT THE TIME.
YOU = NOT PERSECUTED
PLEASE STOP WAITING FOR THE RAPTURE. IT’S SILLY.
BESIDES, IF IT WERE THE RAPTURE, WOULD JESUS REALLY CALL UP A PHILLISTINE LIKE YOU? LIKELY NOT, ASSHOLE.
AND FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, NEWS MEDIA? PLEASE STOP REPORTING ON THIS NONSENSE! YOU ARE GIVING THEM A FALSE SENCE OF LEGITIMACY. GET YOUR COLLECTIVE HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS, AND STOP IT. NOW.
Thank you. That is all.
Hey, are you Republican?
Would you like to see exactly who you’re in league with?
Read this.
Are you still Republican? Because this article is talking about some scary shit. Death over life. Control over body and mind. This is where we’re going.
I used to read alot of Sherri S Tepper. Her books used to terrify me, but I read them because they were fantasy. I used to think “good thing that would never REALLY happen.” I don’t read Sherri S Tepper anymore. Because her visions are coming true.
For a fun weekend activity, why don’t we all come up with all the ways our “religious right” resembles those religious extremists in the middle east who breed terrorists and ignorance.
Fun hint: THERE ARE ALOT OF SIMILARITIES
Better stock up on all the good burkas now, ladies.
*think I’m exaggerating? am I exaggerating more than the people saying that a HPV vaccine would cause more teenagers to have sex?
yeah, that’s what I thought.
Linked in BoingBoing, a very good story about the Vatican Astronomer.
my favorite bit:
“Religion needs science to keep it away from superstition and keep it close to reality, to protect it from creationism, which at the end of the day is a kind of paganism - it’s turning God into a nature god. And science needs religion in order to have a conscience, to know that, just because something is possible, it may not be a good thing to do.”
which reminds me (sort of) of something bobbing around in my brain. Last sunday, during the “prayers and concerns” part of the church service, someone asked our pastor to pray for those “who’s faith has been shaken by the DaVinci Code.” Poor MJ was flustered, and said something like “Ohh…Ok. The DaVinci code is a very good book, but it’s not biblical.”
Exactly. NOT BIBLICAL. It’s a work of FICTION.
Who are these people who’s faith is so tenuous, who feel that they have failed to instill in themselves and in their children a strong enough faith, so that when a work of FICTION comes out (DaVinci Code, Harry Potter, etc), they are TORN APART over it.
A fictional book is NOT something that supposed to shake your faith. LIFE shakes your faith.
A president who claims he was chosen by God to lead America…straight into the dumps. That should shake your faith.
The war in Iraq should shake your faith.
The AIDS crisis in Africa should shake your faith.
Watching a loved one sicken and slowly die as you stand by helpless. THAT should shake your faith.
Not a book. Grow the fuck up.
And, while I’m on the topic…questioning your faith is a good one. What do we end up with when people do not constantly re-evaluate themselves, their faith, their morals on a daily basis? Pat Robertson. Those who are immovable, who don’t change, who don’t think to themselves “Why does this happen? Where is God? Where am I while this is going on? What can I do?” end up blindly following those who scream “infidels” at the slightest infraction.
Much like the radical islamists in the middle east.
And much like the evolution they reject, those who refuse to bend, to change, to grow, to truly love…will never adapt. And those that don’t adapt are doomed to die out when the conditions on this big island change.
What YOU said
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