So I think I mentioned a while back that my mother and I are making my wedding invitations by hand. Of course, everyone who hears this is all “ohhhh…WHY are you doing that? you can get cheap ones online!!!”
To which I respond that I don’t WANT cheap ones, I want nice invitations. And yes, I could get nice invitations, which get cheaper the more you order. But we don’t need alot. We need slightly under 100.
And it gets worse: because we’re having a big reception seperate from the wedding, and a small dinner reception after the ceremony with specific menu items to choose from, we have two different invitation wordings, a reception card, and 3 different response cards:
People invited to the wedding only: wedding invite, dinner reception RSVP with menu choices
People invited to the big reception only: reception invite, plain RSVP
People invite to BOTH: wedding invite, separate card with info for big reception, RSVP with spots menu selection for dinner, and response for big reception.
Yeah. How much would we be paying for that shit?
But here’s the tricky part. I’M doing all the printing, while my mother is doing all the assembling. I have the fancy gold vellum paper, and she has the burgandy cardstock paper that the vellum will be attached to.
She has pre-cut all the burgandy paper for the invitation and for each response card.
So when I printed out all those stupid response and reception cards, which have vastly different word count amounts, apparently, I made them the wrong size. They are too small, and, according to my mother, will “look weird” if she uses them as is.
And because the wedding is in TWO FUCKING MONTHS HOLY SHIT! the invites have to be out by next week. Which means I have to run to Michael’s tomorrow morning and buy 30 more sheets of the vellum (at $6/10 sheets), print them, and then get them in the mail by the afternoon. Probably have to overnight them. Which is MORE money.
And my mother is yelling at ME, because I didn’t know any better. Because SHE could have printed them out where she works (need a lazer printer, as inkjet on vellum smears like a mo-fo), except I HAD to have this fancy font that THEY don’t have, so I’M the one who has to print them, and…
*deep breaths*
It’s only going to get worse, I know.
Can I skip the wedding and go straight to the honeymoon???
Drive to Nevada. Marry each other. Hump like deranged weasels. Send out invites on some old impact printer spool paper. Tell the caterer where to show up, and stay at the reception for thirty minutes.
Leave, get on flight, hump like deranged weasels.
The Scoot has a point.
And I think you just made the case for all the WHY are you doing that people.
I’m going to send you that recipe, I really am.
Go, go, Bride-zilla!
Vegas… yesyes. Vegas.
OOOoooooh, Vegas babee! And you don’t have to tell anyone you did it, because what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.
But…but then I’d have to return the presents!!!
I will put up with this for two months…for the presents.
ESC
You will put up with it til a week before the wedding (mine is in a week) and then you will start short-cutting your dream projects. Fancy tablecloths become “poufs” on the table because you get tired of sewing hems on 4 sides of sheer fabric for 30 tablecloths. You stop caring whether your bridesmaids actually have dresses that fit, you just want them to show up….and then you are really ready for the honeymoon.
So no, you can’t skip the wedding and go straight to the honeymoon unless I can!!!
AIeeee…. this is why I am NOT making my own invitations. All my friends are like “ooo, you are crafty” and even the FIANCE` mentioned it. So um, I would be one of those people saying “you are nuts.” But I totally understand your reasoning for it. And if I could help, I would. But I can’t so I’ll just pray for you okay!?
V-E-G-A-S. Or better yet, save the money it would take to get to Vegas and go to a justice of the peace. You can still have the party, and you only have to return the gifts if you DON’T GET MARRIED AT ALL.
You coulda came and saw me - HELLO, I work for a printer! In Marietta…it actually wouldn’t be as expensive as you might think. Online, yes it would get expensive, but with me as a hook up, you can run all that stuff in combo on larger sheets and cut them by lot…saves money and much less stress for YOU =)
Yes but we had already started the process BEFORE I “met” you. Otherwise, I would have been ALL ABOUT
using youtaking advantage of my online social network.I have said many times that the extra cost of something is well worth the amount of acida I prevent by paying someone else to do it instead of doing it myself.
I believe you understand now.
Ah - well that makes more sense, but to add insult to injury - you COULD have sent her the font, usually in email. It’s actually really simple, most people don’t realize that you can do it. But being in the biz…sorry I didn’t know of your issues before, cuz I totally could have helped you out!
I did send the font. OK, let me go to back story.
The problem is that they have an ink jet printer. When I did a test on our ink jet printer with the vellum paper, it smeared like a sonuvabitch. Took all night to dry before we could safely touch it.
But at work we have one of them fancy…uhh..crayony wax color printers? It could print on the vellum without smearing.
so we decided that i would do the printing on vellum, and my parents would do the assembly. I did send them the font (and oh what fun THAT was explaining to my father how to unzip and install a new font), so that they could print out the addresses on the envelopes.
So does that all make sense?