…half baked and full of cheese!
but why can’t I stop laughing? IT IS WRONG! AND TERRIBLE!!!
this
never mind, pretend you never saw this. read my earlier post about cloning, because I assure you that it’s HILARIOUS! CLONING HILARITY! JUST BELOW! NO INAPPROPRATE REFERENCES TO A POOR VEGETATIVE WOMAN HERE!!!
Cloning doesn’t involve sheep. Well, sometimes it does, but for most geneticists, cloning means something very different then ending up with identical wooly friends and a Nobel prize.
How can I describe the headachey nightmare that is cloning to you “normals” out there…?
OK, imagine that you are making a picture of a landscape. Actually, you’re designing a puzzle of a landscape. But you’re not starting from scratch. You have to find each detail of your landscape from a huge stack of pre-existing puzzles. Want a tree? You have to find a puzzle that has a tree in it, remove it, and put it in your puzzle.
Simple, right?
No, because all the pieces have to match up. If you have an end piece that’s got a sqiggly part then a bump, that tree piece you want to put in better have the complementary squiggle and indent.
So you try the tree, and you try it every possible way, and it just won’t fit. So you find another puzzle with a tree, and try to make THAT work. Now you finally have your tree, but now you need to add in some shrubbery. And remember, ALL THE PIECES HAVE TO FIT! And you keep going until you have the landscape puzzle you want.
Now, imagine doing that with bits of DNA.
I’m surprized my eyes aren’t bleeding. Fortunately, we have a nice bit of software that will do a lot of the work for us, but it’s still alot of trial and error. And it all has to be PERFECT in the end, because I’m taking the bits of DNA I end up with, and putting them into my strain (integrating, for the actual geneticists out there - we don’t do plasmid assays. everything is integrated, so I have to make sure my homology and my orientations are correct).
Now that I’ve successfully blown YOUR mind, here are some fun search terms that found my site recently.
women “locker room” modesty (Google) cover that bush, chica!
dangers, milk, throwing up (Google) yep, drink too much milk and throw up, though I dont’ think I’ve ever posted about this…
“period 4 times a year” (Google) yep, posted about this. i highly recommend it
“rollercoaster” too fat “unable to ride” (Yahoo) yes, please remind me of that painful memory
want a sprint phone without renewing contract (Google) good luck. if you figure it out, let me know, OK?
hey abe abe (Google) wtf?
“Be suspicious of people who claim to love Motherhood but who always seem to hate actual mothers.” (Google) right on, sista!
“grandpa sex” (Yahoo) ew ew ew fall off a cliff and DIE PERVERT!
love sayings for my profile (Google) awww…are you in love? why don’t you come up with something original instead of using something of mine!!!
coughing up traces of blood in phlegm (Google) umm…wow. go see a doctor…RIGHT NOW!
Easter morning came bright and…cloudy. Damn. I had to sing at church, and since Kev is ALWAYS late when I make him come to church to hear me sing, I decided that he would go early with me (choir has to report a half hour early). The result of this genius? I was late! Pbbth!
So I was rushed and confused through a service with a TON of music in it. I had forgotten one piece, and someone slipped me an extra copy just in time. At one point, the choir director sat down in an empty seat in front of me. I got his attention and pointed to the bulletin, where it said for a certain hymm “choir introduction: Alleluiah” what? all we had was the copy of the hymm..nothing about an alleluiah. I was panicking because I thought I had forgotten something else! But J had forgotten to make copies of it for us. Quickly he grabbed HIS copy and we passed it around like a middle school note.
All in all, in spite of limited rehearsal time and some complex music, we pulled it off.
whew!
Afterwards I was craving some brunch. Now, apparently, easter brunch is not a big deal down here. I dont’ know why. It is a family TRADITION in Pittsburgh to, after church, head on over to a local hotel or event catering facility, where, just for Easter, they set up an Easter Brunch Buffet. An omlette station. A carving station. Huge platters of bacon, potatoes, scrambled eggs, rigatoni, chicken, etc. And a big dessert station with mousse and cheesecake and ice cream, and allllll kinds of fattening goodies. Because we firmly believe, that as soon as Jesus woke up in that tomb, the first thing he wanted was a good brunch. Some eggs benedict and pasta salad, perhaps.
Not so here. And Kev had never heard of such a thing. Since this was the first year I wasn’t flying home for Easter, mom had sent me a care package earlier in the week, containing my Daffin’s meltaway chocolate egg, dog biscuits, some jelly beans, shirts for Kev, a cute outfit for me, AND…hehe… one of those playstation dance pads! Woohoo! Haven’t had time to try it out yet, though. Always thought they looked fun, but would never embarass myself IN PUBLIC while 4 year old kids bopped like an expert.
Anyway, so as to ensure that I got my official easter brunch, mom included a nice chunk of change. So after church, Kev and I went to my FAVORITE brunchy place in atlanta, Murphy’s. There was a 45 minute wait, but it was SO WORTH IT! We sat on the patio, heated, with the clear plastic tarps blocking out…well, MOST of the pouring rain. Since mom was paying, technically, I went for the whole experience. TWO mimosas…because along with his eggs and salad, Jesus would also like some champagne and orange juice, please.
Stuffed full…we split a key lime tart. Hey…MOM paid, right?
When we got home, I completely passed out on the couch. Deadweight. Couldn’t wake myself up for anything. ROLLING THUNDER passing overhead didn’t make me twitch.
Ahhhh…what a great Easter! Now we’re snacking on a nice hot layered dip: ground beef, refried beans, cheddar, and salsa with chips. Mmmmm…..
Hope everyone had a wonderful easter stuffed with chocolate eggs and bunnies and jelly beans. And if you’re Jewish…hope you had a great sunday avoiding crazed Christian church traffic!
*****
Do you go to hell for having screaming pounding doggy style sex on Easter? Just asking.
Just watched an animal planet special on dragons. It was cool, but weird. It was made as if dragons were real. There were speculations about it’s anatomy, mating habits, offspring rearing…
all narrated by Patrick Stewart, which gave it all an air of authority.
Very real.
Very surreal.
Today is the first Good Friday in a long time that I remembered the whole day to not eat meat. I don’t really make any conscious effort to avoid meat on fridays during lent. but for some reason, Good Friday, I make the effort. unfortunatetly, while I usually have a fish meal planned for dinner, I usually brain fart in the morning and bring a ham sandwich for lunch. today I was late for work because I made TUNA SALAD baby! mmm…lunch was good…
I also realized tonight that the problem with being somewhat of an “experimental” cook, often I stumble upon something REALLY great, and have no idea how I did it. For example, I made salmon tonight. I wanted a bit of asian flair, so I decided to make a soy sauce based marinade. So…ok…what do I have in the condiment department that I can add to soy sauce?
sweet and sour sauce
wasabe powder
sesame oil
rice vinegar
maple syrup
honey
ummm…I think that’s it. I was really just grabbing stuff out of the pantry.
Marinade for about a half hour, bake in oven at 350. pour the remaining marinade into a sauce pan, bring to boil. add corn starch dissolved in water to thicken. use as glaze for salmon and dip for accompanying grilled asparagus.
now…HOW MUCH of each ingredient did I use? I have no idea. a couple shakes, a dash, a squirt…until it..”looked” right. Kev wants me to remember all this so I can make it again.
guess I’ll just have to experiment!
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